I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize