it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
