I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
