and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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