im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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