are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
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I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
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In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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