At least make sure they are 18
Why
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
