I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
