Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
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i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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