i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize