I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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