well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
