spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
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