have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize
