I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
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