She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
