Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
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