Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
