i just google imaged poop.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
