So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
