i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
