Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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