First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
