CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
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