so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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