clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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