We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
