So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
