my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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