Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Randomize
