So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Quick, to the slutcave!
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
