GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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