The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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