If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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