Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize