What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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