i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I bet he comes in French.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
