I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
