My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize