are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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