Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
