how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize