I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
You've changed since you got that strap on
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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