thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Dicks are not precious.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
