Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
