im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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