i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
