I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
