try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.