he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Randomize
